Weird Al Yankovic Quotes

• Alanis Morissette and I actually used to date. I especially liked it when we went to the movies.
• That's something the kids should know about. Reading is a gateway to witchcraft and lesbianism.
• I wrote 'Eat It' because I wanted to buy a house. It worked.
• I have very mixed feelings about [Napster]. On one hand, I'm concerned that the rampant downloading of my copyright-protected material over the Internet is severely eating into my album sales and having a decidedly adverse effect on my career. On the other hand, I can get all the Metallica songs I want for FREE! WOW!!!!!
• What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist's performance on whether or not they had a good seat?
• I think my chances of getting into the Rock 'N' Roll Hall Of Fame are about as good as Milli Vanilli's.
• My brothers and sisters all hated me 'cause I was an only child.
• I'll never forget the first thing she said to me: 'Hey - you have weasels all over your face.' Right then I knew it was true love.
• Shoppin' online for deals on some writable media I edit Wikipedia
• I'm nerdy to the extreme Whiter than sour cream
• I sued Taco Bell 'Cause I ate half a million Chalupas And I got fat! I sued Panasonic They never said I shouldn't use their microwave To dry off my cat!
• Oh, you don't wanna mess with the R-I-double-A They'll sue you if you burn that CD-R It doesn't matter if you're a grandma, or a seven-year-old girl They'll treat you like the evil, hard-bitten, criminal scum you are
• Never had a date That you couldn't inflate
• If money can't buy happiness, I guess I'll have to rent it.
• Well, besides working on the album, I got married and had a kid. So, you know, in spite of that petition that was floating around asking me not to reproduce, I did it anyway.
• UHF

weird al yankovic