Quotes
 I can say what I want to. It's freedom of speech, ain't it?. We've got to take the neighborhood back. We've got to go in there. Just forget telling your child to go to the Peace Corps. It's right around the corner. It's standing on the corner. It can't speak English. It doesn't want to speak English. I can't even talk the way these people talk. 'Why you ain't where you is go.' I don't know who these people are. And I blamed the kid until I heard the mother talk. Then I heard the father talk. This is all in the house. You used to talk a certain way on the corner and you got into the house and switched to English. Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't land a plane with 'why you ain't:'. You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth. There is no Bible that has that kind of language. Where did these people get the idea that they're moving ahead on this? Well, they know they're not, they're just hanging out in the same place, five or six generations sitting in the projects when you're just supposed to stay there long enough to get a job and move out.- I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were ever supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever.
- I like puddin pops
- I am not interested in statistics that tell me things are not as bad as they seem. Things are horrible. I have met people crying about what is happening, but there is no solution yet. Our children are trying to tell us something, and we are not listening. I don't care what the statistics say.
- The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
- Y'see, the kids, they listen to the rap music, which gives them the brain damage. With their hippin' and their hoppin', and their bippin', and their boppin'...so they don't know what the jazz is all about! You see, Jazz is like a Jello Pudding pop - no! Actually, it's more like Kodak film - no! Actually, jazz is like the new Coke; it'll be around forever! Heh heh heh...
- Pokeyman?! Pokeyman with the 'pokey' and the 'man' and the thing where the guy comes out of the thing and then he (mumbles incoherently, flaps ears) oh ah ah ah ah!
bill cosby
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