- If poetry is like an orgasm, an academic can be likened to someone who studies the passion-stains on the bedsheets.
- Canadians look down on the United States and consider it Hell. They are right to do so. Canada is to the United States what, in Dante's scheme, Limbo is to Hell.
- God is indeed dead. He died of self-horror when He saw the creature He had made in His own image.
- When you argue with your inferiors, you convince them of only one thing: they are as clever as you.
- My neighbour doesn't want to be loved as much as he wants to be envied.