'Where are you from?' 'I'm a Liverpool fan from London.' 'Well laddie ... What's it like to be in heaven?'

It was the most difficult thing in the world. When I went to tell the chairman, it was like walking to the electric chair. That's the way it felt.

Aye, here we are with problems at the top of the league.

Nonsense! I've kicked every ball, headed out every cross. I once scored a hat-trick; One was lucky, but the others were great goals.