The only way of enduring one disaster after the next is to love the very idea of disaster: if we succeed, there are no further surprises, we are superior to whatever occurs, we are invincible victims.

Everything is deception - I've always known that. Yet this certitude has afforded me no relief, except at the moments when it was violently present to my mind.…

One cannot live without motives. I have no motives left, and I am living.

Having destroyed all my connections, burned my bridges, I should feel a certain freedom, and in fact I do. One so intense I am afraid to rejoice in it.