Flip Wilson Quotes

Flip Wilson shares witty, character-driven jokes that poke fun at life and performance.

27 quotes

1. Don't order one for the road, because the road is already laid out.

2. Funny is an attitude.

3. Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun.

4. [about his alter-ego] I don't think Geraldine will be back. She was the girl of my dreams, and she carried me longer than my mother did.

5. It would be ridiculous for me to say anything negative regarding blacks having an equal opportunity on TV. After all, I was number one in the ratings four times last year and twice this season. What could be more damn equal than that? If they get any more equal, I don't want it.

6. Most drag impersonations are a drag. But women can like Geraldine, men can like Geraldine, everyone can like Geraldine.

7. My show is my statement. What I have to say is on the screen. My life is my own. I don't want to talk about my private self. Why should I?

8. The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.

9. The secret of my success with Geraldine is that she's not a put-down of women.

10. Violence is a tool of the ignorant.

11. What you see is what you get.

12. When you're hot, you're hot; when you're not, you're not.

13. With all the trouble black people have, they try to forget on weekends. You've got to be good to make them laugh.

14. You can't expect to hit the jackpot if you don't put a few nickels in the machine.

15. I reserve my right to be a nigger.

16. Funny is not a color. Being black is only good from the time you get from the curtain to the microphone.

17. If I could marry my motorcycle, I'd roll her right up to the altar.

18. After having seen the job done on that first show of mine, I realized that I felt like I wanted to work again for a short while. Two, three years, then stop.

19. My happiest memory of childhood was my first birthday in reform school. This teacher took an interest in me. In fact, he gave me the first birthday presents I ever got: a box of Cracker Jacks and a can of ABC shoe polish.

20. Before you can hit the jackpot, you have to put a coin in the machine.

21. I have the bug again. I'm expecting the response to seeing the show again on Nick to be very good, and this will set the groundwork for what I want to do.

22. My main point is to be funny; if I can slip a message in there, fine.

23. The cost of living's going up, and the chance of living's going down!..

24. Everyone in this house and the houses next door knows when I'm in the sauna because I start singing, and I sing the blues when I'm in a really good mood. I have a really loud voice, you know.

25. I study a lot of philosophy. I want to be an example of how to enjoy this success, and that's exactly what I've done. I've enjoyed every moment.

26. Being a comedian is like being a con man. You have to make 'em like you before you can fool 'em.

27. I was number one in the ratings four times last year and twice this season. What could be more damn equal than that? If they get any more equal, I don't want it.