These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it.

I heard Tonya Harding is calling herself the Charles Barkley of figure skating. I was going to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized I have …

(Charles in response to Kenny Smith's jokes about his weight) I am not fat, it's the camera, it puts on 10 pounds. (Kenny Smith) Well, there must be a whole lo…

It's kinda great to see the Celtics doin well again 'cause that was so much fun in my day to go to the Boston Garden and they spit at you and throw things at y…