Some critics think the way I write is somehow disrespectful to food. But how can you write a restaurant column without being entertaining? You might as well not get up in the morning. People complain my sense of humour is puerile but the reason I have a job is because my sense of humour is puerile.

I get so excited when I know I'm going to a good restaurant, then, when I do the review, I write myself up into such a frenzy that I have to go out and eat all…

My dad was undeniably famous when I was a kid - he was on Wogan and Clive James and the radio every week, but as far as I was concerned he wasn't famous enough…

I wanted to be a great literary novelist so that people would eventually talk about Alan Coren the scribbler and father of the great Giles.

Simon Amstell: So Penny, you used to do a fashion column for the Daily Mail, didn't you? Penny Smith: Yes I've done many strange things in my time. Simon Amste…

'He's as reliable as a Volvo.' Colin Powell

Rice Krispies happens to be one of my favorite junk foods, just as I regard Michener as superior among junk writers.