Whatever cleaning goes on on the planet, women do 99% of it. But see, women are not as proud of their 99% as men are of our one! We clean something up, we're gonna talk about it all year long. It might be on the news, you don't know. A woman could be out re-paving the driveway. Men will actually get up, go outside and say, 'Hey baby! Man it's hot as hell out here! Look, don't worry about emptyin' that ashtray in the den, I done got it, all right? Did it for you, sweet pea. I'm gonna take a nap now.'
More from Jeff Foxworthy
The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... …
Permalink to quote #10 Hell, when I was in high school, a 'drive-by shooting' meant somebody had their rear end hanging out a car window!
Permalink to quote #12 When I was a kid, my parents had a 900-pound television on top of a TV tray. My dad's theory was, 'Let him pull it over his head a few times, he'll learn.'
Permalink to quote #9