It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.

The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.

So who's in a hurry?

A great many people have come up to me and asked how I manage to get so much work done and still keep looking so dissipated.

I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, Spencer is dead, so is Milton, …

Mark how my fame rings out from zone to zone: A thousand critics shouting: 'He's unknown!'

Being a writer in a library is rather like being a eunuch in a harem.