I had plenty of qualms about Audrey when we met for the first rehearsal, but from then on, working with her was one big kick... Audrey and I decided we'd throw a party for the cast and the crew when the picture was finished. We went all out, had it catered by Romanoff's - nothing but the best. In the middle of the party, Audrey sidled up to me, jabbed me with her elbow, and said, out of the corner of her mouth, 'Hey, Shirl-Girl, whattaya think the bruise is gonna be for this bash?'

Audrey was meek, gentle and ethereal, understated both in her life and in her work. She walked among us with a light pace, as if she didn't want to be noticed.…

I don't want to be ungallant, but Audrey's too old and wrinkled for me.

I can't stand it! I know I've got the best tits on stage, and yet they're all staring at a girl who hasn't got any!

A scout troop consists of twelve little kids dressed like schmucks following a big schmuck dressed like a kid.

All good work is done in defiance of management.

I wish I could say that the Chancellor of the Exchequer had done himself less than justice. Unfortunately, I can only say that I believe he has done himself ju…