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To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside of Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.

C. S. Lewis#163

LoveRiskSafetyVulnerability

About this quote

What does it mean?
Love makes you vulnerable and risks heartbreak, but avoiding it leads to a safe yet deadened soul.
In plain terms
Love risks pain, but not loving makes you hard and unchangeable.
What can you take from it?
Risk heartbreak to stay alive.

Where it applies

  • relationship advice
  • self protection
  • emotional health

Putting it to work

  • embrace risk
  • love openly

Questions to consider

  • Is safety worth the cost?
  • Are you protecting yourself too much?

Another view

Some protection is necessary to avoid genuine harm.

More from C. S. Lewis

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  2. Need-love cries to God from our poverty; Gift-love longs to serve, or even to suffer for, God; Appreciative love says: 'We give thanks to thee for thy great gl…

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  3. 'Perhaps you will get some idea of it if you think like this. You may have been in a room in which there was a window that looked out on a lovely bay of the se…

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