More from Eddie Izzard

  1. '[Steve McQueen, in The Great Escape] jumps on a motorbike, took off,and whoom, in 15 minutes he's in the borders of Switzerland. This is f…
  2. If women fall over wearing heels, that's embarrassing; but if a bloke falls over wearing heels, then you have to kill yourself! End of your…
  3. 'Two languages in one head? No one can live at that speed! Good Lord man, you're asking the impossible!' 'But, the Dutch speak four languag…
  4. Yes, no smoking in bars now, and soon there'll be, no drinking and no talking! Be careful, California, you're supposed to be the crazy stat…
  5. This bloke who pinned a note on a door, saying 'Hang on a minute!' But in German, so: 'Ein minuten bitte! Ich habe eine kleinen problemo av…
  6. We stole countries with the cunning use of flags. Just sail around the world and stick a flag in. 'I claim India for Britain!' And they're …
  7. 'That's one saved fucking queen! It shouldn't be 'God save the queen,' it should be 'God attack the queen!' 'God attack the queen/Send big …
  8. After the war, there was this feeling of no empire no longer : 'All right, come on, Europe, give these countries back. Britain?' 'What?' 'W…

All Eddie Izzard quotes