Quote #58

The Queen Mother! Bom-bom-bom I'm the queen...The Queen Mother is amazing! She has artificial hips, she has mechanical arms, she has a bionic eye...she cost six million dollars! [Sings Six Million Dollar Man theme tune whilst miming running very slowly and waving like the Queen Mother] dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit-dit Papparazzi, two thousand yards! Dit-dit-dit-dit-dit [resumes theme tune] Off with the tiara! [Mimes throwing tiara like a discus] Sh-d-d-d-pow!

More from Eddie Izzard

  1. I preferred Diana's direction to the Queen's direction. The Queen is very 'Grrr' and Diana was slightly more 'Oh!'
  2. Armageddon is Australian for 'Armageddon outta here!'
  3. Diana died! Diana died and...everyone's gone quiet. What's going on?
  4. I don't have techno-fear, I have techno-JOY! I love technology! I love to get a new machine. Every time I get a new machine, I think, 'This…
  5. They had a track laid out with numbers, mystic numbers- 1, 5: 7, 8, you know: A bit of a broken doll there, some girl keeping lookout with …
  6. People on movies are always so professional with computers. [Mimes using a computer] 'Hacking into Pentagon. Double click on 'yes''. Oh pas…
  7. 'Give us cash! I steal from the rich and give to the poor! I'm trying to be a myth; give us cash!' 'No, I'm not gonna give you cash.' 'Go o…
  8. 'My name is Mrs. Smith, I've made apples out of bread and dripping, a bit of green paint, and corrugated iron.' 'No, these are horrible app…

All Eddie Izzard quotes