'I don't like the way my teeth protrude. I'm going to have them done, but I just haven't had the time. Apart from that... I'm perfect.'

'I've made no effort to become a guitar hero because I can't play the fucking guitar!'

'Hi, my name is Kim Basinger... ummm, Freddie Mercury.'

'I never carry money, just like the real Queen. If I fancy something in a shop I always ask someone on our staff to buy it.'

I'm proud to say I have never been wrong about anything.

To have 'It', the fortunate possessor must have that strange magnetism which attracts both sexes. He or she must be entirely unselfconscious and full of self-c…

I am very attractive and get cuter the older I get. I'm even getting -- well, not statuesque, but I'm growing. I'm expanding. That's the best way to put it.