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Jeff Foxworthy
Quote #47
If you smoked during your wedding.
More from Jeff Foxworthy
If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the state patrolman to kiss her ass.
If your dog passes gas and you claim it.
If you own a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say 'Cool Whip' on the side.
If your daughter's Barbie Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard.
If you think a quarter horse is that ride in front of Kmart.
If you've ever made change in the offering plate. (Jeff: 'Guilty.')
If you own a Waffle House credit card.
If you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said 'concentrate'.
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