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Jeff Foxworthy
Quote #48
If your dog passes gas and you claim it.
More from Jeff Foxworthy
If you smoked during your wedding.
If your daughter's Barbie Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard.
If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the state patrolman to kiss her ass.
If you've ever made change in the offering plate. (Jeff: 'Guilty.')
If you own a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say 'Cool Whip' on the side.
If you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said 'concentrate'.
If you think a quarter horse is that ride in front of Kmart.
If your working television sits on top of your non-working television.
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