A card from Michael, and he says, could I play a record for his friend who has just come back from Nepal after two and a half years where he's been talking with the stones. I'm not entirely sure this isn't a medical condition actually, Michael. If the stones have been talking back to him, then I think we have real cause for concern.

And this week's programme is being engineered by Nicky, whose loveliness is enough to drive fat men to drink, but in her defence she'll come and have a drink w…

And Kay wrote to me from Bielefeld, where he or she is stationed. He or she or uncommited, I don't know.

Here's an oldie which I always enjoy, you probably loathe it, I don't know, don't really care. It's my programme, not yours.

I have Bright's disease and he has mine.

I am sitting on the sofa. By the fire and staying in. Me head is free of comfort And me nose is free of skin Me friends have run for cover, They have left me p…

My day started off particularly well with a phonecall from Richard in Germany who told me, he says 'Do you want any wine? My father owns a vineyard.' Owns a vi…