If I were going to convert to any religion I would probably choose Catholicism because it at least has female saints and the Virgin Mary.

If a stranger taps you on the ass and says, 'How's the little lady today!' you will probably cringe. But if he's an American, he's only being friendly.

If the national mental illness of the United States is megalomania, that of Canada is paranoid schizophrenia.

I've never understood why people consider youth a time of freedom and joy. It's probably because they have forgotten their own.

If the religious leaders have influence, they will not permit girls and boys to wrestle together, as recently happened in Shiraz.

I don't mind praying to the eternal Father, but I must be the only man in the country afflicted with an eternal mother.

Dieu s'est fait homme; soit. Le diable s'est fait femme!