Quote #26

Remember, Humphrey Bogart was not the first choice for Casablanca; Ronald Reagan was. So maybe if Ronnie had taken the part, Humprey Bogart could have been president. And maybe if you date this guy, you could be president too!

More from Rita Rudner

  1. Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.
  2. Never play peekaboo with a child on a long plane trip. There's no end to the game. Finally I grabbed him by the bib and said, 'Look, it's a…
  3. When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
  4. My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.
  5. When I meet a man I ask myself, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'
  6. My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my n…
  7. When I was a kid I had two friends, and they were imaginary, and they would only play with each other.
  8. My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.

All Rita Rudner quotes