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Steven Wright
Quote #8
After they make styrofoam, what do they ship it in?
More from Steven Wright
About a year ago, my girlfriend was on the pill, wearing a diaphragm, and an IUD all at once. Recently, she had a baby; baby was born weari…
All of the people in my building are insane. The guy above me designs synthetic hairballs for ceramic cats. The lady across the hall tried …
A while ago, I left my apartment building and walked my dog... on the ledge. A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of w…
All the plants in my house are dead---I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes.
A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, 'Wish you were h…
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
A fool and his money are soon partying.
Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo!
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