More from Ambrose Bierce

  1. Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
  2. Acquaintance, n. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. A degree of friendship called slight whe…
  3. Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
  4. Bacchus, n. A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.
  5. Back, n. That part of your friend which it is your privilege to contemplate in your adversity.
  6. Absurdity, n. A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
  7. Barometer, n. An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.
  8. Abstainer, n. A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. A total abstainer is one who abstains from everythi…

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