(To Kenny Smith when he arrived late) When we say 'Be on at 7 o'clock,' that don't mean black-folk time.

I'm still trying to get my grandmother off her old behind and into the Olympics. Why not? She can dust. (on the sport of curling)

Almost all those politicians took money from Enron, and there they are holding hearings. That's like O.J. Simpson getting in the Rae Carruth jury pool.

Bunch of high school kids with $70 million contracts. Damn! I hate my mother for having me too soon! (on the influx of high-schoolers into the NBA)