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It is a curious truth - and yet a truth forced upon us by daily observation - that it is not the women who have suffered most who are the unhappy women. A state of permanent unhappiness - not the morbid, half-cherished melancholy of youth, which generally wears off with wiser years, but that settled, incurable discontent and dissatisfaction with all things and all people, which we see in some women, is, with very rare exceptions, at once the index and the exponent of a thoroughly selfish character. ~ Ch. 10

Dinah Maria Mulock#35

HappinessSufferingCharacterSelfishness

About this quote

What does it mean?
The most unhappy women are often those with selfish characters rather than those who have suffered most.
In plain terms
Constant unhappiness usually comes from selfishness, not from past suffering.
What can you take from it?
Examine your own character if you feel permanently dissatisfied.

Where it applies

  • evaluating relationships
  • self-assessment
  • social observation

Putting it to work

  • reflect on selfish tendencies
  • cultivate gratitude
  • observe others critically

Questions to consider

  • Is your dissatisfaction rooted in selfishness?
  • How does suffering affect happiness?

Another view

Suffering can sometimes lead to long-term unhappiness without character flaws.

More from Dinah Maria Mulock

  1. There is no sorrow under heaven which is, or ought to be, endless. To believe or to make it so, is an insult to Heaven itself. ~ Ch. 10

    Permalink to quote #34
  2. Though it is folly to suppose that happiness is a matter of volition, and that we can make ourselves content and cheerful whenever we choose - a theory that ma…

    Permalink to quote #36
  3. What comfort there is in a cheerful spirit! how the heart leaps up to meet a sunshiny face, a merry tongue, an even temper, and a heart which either naturally,…

    Permalink to quote #37

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