Quote #41

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.

More from Erma Bombeck

  1. Someone once threw me a small, brown, hairy kiwi fruit, and I threw a wastebasket over it until it was dead.
  2. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
  3. Sexually active coat hangers are at their peak when they are in a small closet. We once lived in an apartment with a closet so small it cou…
  4. There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
  5. People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfor…
  6. There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it.
  7. Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
  8. What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?

All Erma Bombeck quotes