Flight attendant: 'Does anyone here speak leet?' - 'j0'

Flight attendant: 'Sir, please, it's against airline policy to use the headphone cord to strangle a fellow passenger.' - 'Just gimme five more minutes...'

'There it was! A AMD Athlon CPU that wasn't being overclocked! This was a crime! I felt that I had to right this injustice!'

'This is my life. My game. My rules. If you want to be a part of it, you will respect that.'