'You ever see that sign: 'This Door Must Remain Shut At All Times'... why have a goddamn door?'

'Y'know, God experimented with the other animals before he got around to us. You ladies oughtta thank him for creating the cow, and getting that udder idea out…

'You know what's stupid? Skiing. You get on top of a slippery mountain with sleds on your feet and you go down... big deal. Try not to. Or, go up! Now that'd b…

'Wouldn't it be great if people were the same in bed as they are in every day life? When Mark Spitz gets done, does he do a flip off the headboard and come bac…