Quote #45

[After providing reasons for cutting down the Ten Commandments] So, with all this in mind, I leave you with my revised list of the Two Commandments: 'Thou shalt always be honest and faithful to the provider of thy nooky', and 'Thou shalt try real hard not to kill anyone, unless of course they pray to a different invisible man from the one you pray to'. Two is all you need, Moses could have carried them down the hill in his fucking pocket, and if they had a list like that, I wouldn't mind those folks in Alabama putting it up on the courthouse wall, as long as they included one additional Commandment: 'Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself'!

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All George Carlin quotes