Quote #3
I signed up for what? I thought I was just ordering cable.
More from Jon Stewart
- I've always run by the hierarchy of 'If not funny, interesting. If not interesting, hot. If not hot, bizarre. If not bizarre, break somethi…
- The best-laid plans of mice and comedians usually wind up on the cutting-room floor.
- Little and hairy. But if [The New York Post] want to go with smart and stylish then hey, more power to them. Good luck.
- You wake up and you're still a little drunk and you can't believe that hot girl from last night actually has a beard and a penis.
- You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back on my career and be proud of th…
- I don't know what all the controversy is about, quite frankly. I've met Eminem, I met him backstage, and he's really gay.
- If done for the right reasons, liberating a country from a despot, I don't see how that's immoral. Ah, done quickly, and then we all leave,…
- My life [is] a series of Hollywood orgies and Kabbalah center brunches with the cast of Friends. At least that's what my handlers tell me. …