6 Mark Twain Quotes on Satire

Mark Twain quotes on satire

19. Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

77. Probable nor'east to sou'west winds, varying to the soutard and westard and eastard and points between; high and low barometer, sweeping round from place to place; probable areas of rain, snow, hail, and drought, succeeded or preceded by earthquakes with thunder and lightning.

87. H'aint we got all the fools in town on our side? And ain't that a big enough majority in any town?

117. France has usually been governed by prostitutes.

143. It does look as if Massachusetts were in a fair way to embarrass me with kindnesses this year. In the first place, a Massachusetts judge has just decided in open court that a Boston publisher may sell, not only his own property in a free and unfettered way, but also may as freely sell property which does not belong to him but to me; property which he has not bought and which I have not sold. Under this ruling I am now advertising that judge's homestead for sale, and, if I make as good a sum out of it as I expect, I shall go on and sell out the rest of his property.

159. Conductor, when you receive a fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare: A blue trip slip for an eight-cent fare, A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare, A pink trip slip for a three-cent fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare! Chorus: Punch, brothers, punch with care! Punch in the presence of the passenjare.