I have two very rare photographs. One is a picture of Houdini locking his keys in his car. The other is a rare photograph of Norman Rockwell beating up a child.

I have the oldest typewriter in the world. It types in pencil.

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, 'I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.'

Kerrang : What's the best way you've heard you died? Davey: A heroin overdose, here in London. That was the most real one because that made it all the way back…

The seven dwarfs were each on different little trips. Happy was into grass and grass alone : Happy, that's all he did. Sleepy was into reds. Grumpy, too much s…

People are throwing panties at you. They certainly never do that at my book-signings.