I went to court for a parking ticket. I pleaded insanity. I said, 'Your honor, why would anyone in their right mind park in the passing lane?'

I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time.' So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.

I went to a general store, but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.

If it doesn't fit, you must acquit. (enthymeme uttered during the O.J. Simpson trial)

It is emphatically the province and duty of the judicial department to say what the law is...If two laws conflict with each other, the courts must decide on th…

For better or worse, we are the Court of Appeals for the Hollywood Circuit. Millions of people toil in the shadow of the law we make, and much of their livelih…