Dave Barry Quotes on Satire
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The Constitution of the United States of America, Article V, Section 1: 'There shall be a National Anthem containing incomprehensible words and a high note that normal humans cannot hit without risk of hernia.'
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The first major president to be elected after the War of 1812 was President Monroe Doctrine, who became famous by developing the policy for which he is named. This policy, which is still in effect today, states that:
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Ha ha! We are just poking a little friendly fun at Germany, which is famous for enjoying a good joke, or as the Germans say, 'Sprechnehaltenzoltenfussenmachschnitzerkalbenrollen.' Here is just one hilarious example of what we are talking about:
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So come on, women. Stop being so hard on us guys. Start looking past our macho, hairy exteriors at the thoughtful, sensitive, and yes, vulnerable individuals we can be inside. And while you're at it, make us a sandwich.
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If, in reading this, you are uncertain as to whether a specific statement is meant seriously or not, simply apply this rule of thumb: If the statement makes you consider filing a lawsuit, I was kidding. Ha ha!
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Congress, after years of stalling, finally got around to clearing the way for informal discussions that might lead to possible formal talks that could potentially produce some kind of tentative agreements...
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We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it.