'If I'm gonna commit suicide, I'll go out eatin' pussy to death.'

'There are a lot of good guys out there. I listen to some of these bands and I'm thinkin', 'If the singer didn't sing like that:' There's a great groundswell o…

'It doesn't matter what size your pencil is; it's how you write your name.'

'If you guys are going to be throwing beer bottles at us, at least make sure they're full.'

Suicide was against the law. Johnny had wondered why. It meant that if you missed, or the gas ran out, or the rope broke, you could get locked up in prison to …

At 13 you whack off 19 times a day anyway. Imagine being on a Viagra and like a liter of Mountain Dew and home alone with the VCR on a snow day from school. Hi…

If Hitler wouldn't have killed the Jews, I'd now have to shine their shoes in the middle of Freedom Avenue.