So why is it they allow a guy with big, powerful hands to get on board an airplane? I'll tell you why: they know he's not a security risk, because he's already answered the three big questions. Question number one: 'Did you pack your bags yourself?' No, Carrot Top packed my bags. He and Martha Stewart and Florence Henderson came over to the house last night, fixed me a lovely Lobster Newberg, gave me a full body massage with sacred oils from India, performed a four-way Around-The-World, and then they packed my bags. Next question. 'Have your bags been in your possession the whole time?' No. Usually the night before I travel, just as the moon is rising, I place my suitcases out on the street corner and leave them there, unattended, for several hours. Just for good luck. Next question. 'Has any unknown person asked you to take anything on board?' Hmm : well, what exactly is an 'unknown person'? Surely everyone is known to someone. In fact, just this morning, Kareem and Yusef Ali Ben Gabba seemed to know each other quite well. They kept joking about which one of my suitcases was the heaviest.
About this quote
- What does it mean?
- Security screening questions are undermined by absurd scenarios involving famous people packing bags.
- In plain terms
- Security checks fail if you claim celebrities handled your luggage.
- What can you take from it?
- Security protocols have obvious loopholes.
Where it applies
Putting it to work
Questions to consider
- How effective is current security?
- What makes a risk?
Another view
The joke exaggerates reality and may not reflect actual security risks.
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