Quote #24

One of my friends has these ideas about how we should meet men. 'What we should do on Friday night is we will fucking go get fucked up and fuck yea! we will fucking get fucked up and then we will fucking get tickets to go see the Chippendale's Dancers fuck yea! we will fucking get tickets to see the Chippendale's Dancers.' ... I can get gay guys to dance in my house for free.

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  1. If I'm talking to a guy who's straight and cute and single, I'm like, 'Are you a unicorn?'
  2. The Chippendale's dancers are gay. They're gay. Because there is no such thing as a straight man with visible abdominal muscles. You have t…
  3. Thank God for gay men. Thank God for gay men, because if it were not for gay men, I would not talk to men at all.
  4. [Jo from The Facts of Life] was such a lesbian. Wasn't she the biggest lesbian? I used to watch that show, like, 'Oh, she gonna fuck Blair!'
  5. I love my gay male friends, but when I was a little girl I always used to wish that I would be constantly surrounded by gorgeous guys, and …
  6. One of my first jobs was on a lesbian cruise. I was the ship comedian for the Lesbian Love Boat.
  7. I love the word 'faggot,' because it describes my kind of guy! You see, I am a fag hag. Fag hags are the backbone of the gay community. Wit…
  8. Lesbians love whale watching! They fuckin love it! THEY LOVE IT MORE THAN PUSSY! [...] It's any sea mammal really. Whales, manatees, dolphi…

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