14 Margaret Cho Quotes on Lgbtq

Margaret Cho quotes on lgbtq

20. I love the word 'faggot,' because it describes my kind of guy! You see, I am a fag hag. Fag hags are the backbone of the gay community. Without us, you're nothing! We have been there all through history guiding your sorry ass through the underground railroad! ...We went to the prom with you!

24. One of my friends has these ideas about how we should meet men. 'What we should do on Friday night is we will fucking go get fucked up and fuck yea! we will fucking get fucked up and then we will fucking get tickets to go see the Chippendale's Dancers fuck yea! we will fucking get tickets to see the Chippendale's Dancers.' ... I can get gay guys to dance in my house for free.

25. The Chippendale's dancers are gay. They're gay. Because there is no such thing as a straight man with visible abdominal muscles. You have to suck cock to get that kind of muscle definition. It doesn't work for women. You know I tried, okay?

26. [Jo from The Facts of Life] was such a lesbian. Wasn't she the biggest lesbian? I used to watch that show, like, 'Oh, she gonna fuck Blair!'

27. One of my first jobs was on a lesbian cruise. I was the ship comedian for the Lesbian Love Boat.

28. Lesbians love whale watching! They fuckin love it! THEY LOVE IT MORE THAN PUSSY! [...] It's any sea mammal really. Whales, manatees, dolphins. They go crazy for the dolphins. I don't know what it is - I think it's the blowhole.

29. So I was on the ship, with 800 lesbians. We can't get off. So much drama. 'Were you looking at her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her? WELL, WERE YOU?!' We all got on the same cycle.

30. There was this really prim and proper British woman who used to run horse races for the lesbians on the ship, and the lesbians would get to name the horses, and the really prim and proper British woman would have to read out the names. 'Horse number one, Galloping ... Clitoris... Horse number one, Galloping Clitoris. Very well, carry on... Horse number two.... No Dick for Me. Horse number two, No Dick for Me. Rather a rude name, don't you think? No Dick for Me? Should be, No Dick for Me, Thank You.'

31. I slept with a woman on the ship, and afterwards I was thinking, 'Am I gaaaay? Am I straaaaight?' And then I realized: I'm just slutty. Where's my parade?

32. My mom used to give me messages like this: 'Ummmmmmm... Scott called.... IS HE THE GAY??!!' 'Well, God, mom, I don't know if he's the gay... that's a lot of pressure on just one guy. He has to do the parade all by himself! 'I'm here! I'm queer! ...I guess I'm the only one.' '

66. Women and eating disorders have such a long history, but now I see it happening to gay men. And when it comes to anorexia, bulimia, body dysmorphia, gay men are far more worse than women. They take it way more seriously. 'Why diet when you can take crystal meth?'

72. I would rather have a gay child. If you have a gay son, you know he's not gonna be shooting up his high school. That would get in the way of yearbook.

73. [on having a gay child] And the Three Wise Drag Queens would come, bearing gifts of 1000-thread count sheets, hair products by Frederic Fekkai, and a copy of the Immaculate Collection.

74. I would be happy to have a gay child. He would be a Boy Scout, and he would teach all the other Boy Scouts how to build a fire with two sticks and a back-handed compliment.