Quote #166

I bought some batteries, but they weren't included - so I had to buy them again.

More from Steven Wright

  1. Sally plays strip-poker. Every time she loses she has to put on a piece of clothing.
  2. I bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house.
  3. My friend Sally is a nudist. I went over to her house. There were no doors on the closets. The walls were covered with see-through wallpape…
  4. I have a microwave fireplace. I can lay down in front of the fire for the evening in 8 minutes.
  5. If you're going to shoot a mime, do you use a silencer?
  6. I used to be a narrator for bad mimes.
  7. The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
  8. I was once walking through the forest alone. A tree fell right in front of me, and I didn't hear it.

All Steven Wright quotes