I just lost a buttonhole. [while looking at stage floor]

I invented the cordless extension cord.

I know a man who is a midget dwarf, he's this tall. [holding his thumb and forefinger three inches apart] He poses for trophies.

I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious!

Objects which are usually the motives of our travels by land and sea are often overlooked and neglected if they lie under our eye...We put off from time to tim…

'Where are my keys?' (The Mask)

So long as I remain alive and well I shall continue to feel strongly about prose style, to love the surface of the Earth, and to take pleasure in solid objects…