Quote #58

The... the other important joke, for me, is one that's usually attributed to Groucho Marx; but, I think it appears originally in Freud's 'Wit and Its Relation to the Unconscious', and it goes like this - I'm paraphrasing - um, 'I would never want to belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member.' That's the key joke of my adult life, in terms of my relationships with women.

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  4. This is so antiseptic. It's empty. Why do you think this is funny? You're going by audience reaction? This is an audience that's raised on …
  5. Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love.
  6. Talent is luck. The important thing in life is courage.
  7. What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?
  8. I think that people should mate for life, like pigeons or Catholics.

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