Quote #16

Well, my brother says 'hello'! So, hooray for speech therapy.

More from Emo Philips

  1. The IRS sent back my tax return saying I owed $800. I said, 'If you'll notice, I sent a paper clip with my return. Given what you've been p…
  2. Ambiguity - the Devil's volleyball.
  3. People come up to me and say, 'Emo, do people really come up to you?'
  4. I always wanted a beautiful loving wife and she always wanted to be a citizen.
  5. I ran three miles today... finally I said, 'Lady, take your purse.'
  6. I used to be scared of pretty girls, until one confessed they're just as scared of me.
  7. Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil. Other than that, though, it's…
  8. My girlfriend always giggles during sex. No matter what she's reading.

All Emo Philips quotes