'The world is so complicated... I'M TIRED, I WANNA CUPCAKE!'

[Martini music plays in background]'I know what you're saying <insert female caller's name here>, but I am a happily married man.'

We are losing our National Sovereignty to the world, and we are losing our Personal Sovereignty to the state.

'When all is said and done, America will understand that Michael Moore smells like pancakes.'

We said there warn't no home like a raft, after all. Other places do seem so cramped up and smothery, but a raft don't. You feel mighty free and easy and comfo…

What is the world at its best but a little round field of the moving pictures with two walking together in it?

I amna fou' sae muckle as tired - deid dune. It's gey and hard wark coupin' gless for gless Wi' Cruivie and Gilsanquhar and the like, And I'm no' juist as baul…