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Steven Wright
Quote #102
I wrote a few children's books...not on purpose.
More from Steven Wright
I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, 'If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?'
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I'm a very difficult size to shop for; I'm an extra-medium.
I woke up one day and everything in the apartment had been stolen and replaced with an exact replica. I said to my roommate 'Can you believ…
I'm going to court next week. I've been selected for jury duty. It's kind of an insane case -- 6000 ants dressed up as rice and robbed a Ch…
I wish, when I was born, the first thing I said was 'Quote' so the last thing I said before I died would be 'Unquote.'
I'm moving to Mars next week, so if you have any boxes...
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