I wish, when I was born, the first thing I said was 'Quote' so the last thing I said before I died would be 'Unquote.'

I went to this restaurant last night that was set up like a big buffet in the shape of an Ouija board. You'd think about what kind of food you want, and the ta…

I woke up one day and everything in the apartment had been stolen and replaced with an exact replica. I said to my roommate 'Can you believe this? Everything i…

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.

Insanity - to have to construct a picture of one's life, by making inquiries of others.

Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show.

A rose is a rose is a rose is a rose said my old friend Gertrude Stein.