Quote #2
Imagine being killed by a bow and arrow. That would suck. An arrow killed you, they would never solve the crime. 'Look at that dead guy. Let's go that way.'
More from Mitch Hedberg
- I was gonna get a candy bar; the button I was supposed to push was 'HH', so I went to the side, I found the 'H' button, I pushed it twice. …
- (Talking about his drink) Look at all the limes in this god damn thing! This fuckin' thing is tropical! Look at the limes, how they float. …
- I got so much tartar, I don't got to dip my fishsticks in shit. (Realizing what he said) Actually that's kind of gross.
- Fish are always eating other fish. If fish could scream, the ocean would be loud as shit. You would not want to submerge your head, nothing…
- I can't tell you what hotel I'm stayin' in, but I can say that there are two trees involved. They said, 'Let's call this hotel 'Something..…
- Is a hippopotamus really a hippopotomus or just a really cool opotamus?
- I tried to walk into Target, but I missed.[1]
- See, this CD is in stores. The only way I could get my last CD into a store was to take one in there and leave it. 'Sir, you forgot this!' …