The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my apartment door with my car keys. So the building started up... So, I drove it around for a while. I guess I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked me where I lived. I said, 'right here, officer.' Later, I parked it on the freeway, got out, and yelled at all the cars, 'Get out of my driveway!'
About this quote
- What does it mean?
- The speaker confuses everyday objects and spaces, treating the highway as his personal driveway after a misunderstanding with authority.
- In plain terms
- He mistakes his surroundings and acts entitled after being pulled over by police.
- What can you take from it?
- Confusion can lead to absurd assertions of ownership.
Where it applies
Putting it to work
Questions to consider
- When do you feel lost in familiar places?
- How does authority affect your sense of belonging?
Another view
The joke relies on surrealism that doesn't reflect realistic behavior.
More from Steven Wright
The other day, I was walking my dog around my building...on the ledge.
Permalink to quote #138 The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
Permalink to quote #140 The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.
Permalink to quote #137
Related quotes
A cop stopped me for speeding. He said, 'Why were you going so fast?' I said, 'See this thing my foot is on? It's called an accelerator. When you push down on …
Steven WrightSteven Wright quote #3 'Great-grandfather died under strange circumstances. He opened a vein in his bath.' 'I never knew baths had veins,' protested Gabrilowitsch.' 'I never knew his…
S. J. PerelmanS. J. Perelman quote #2 Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
Spike MilliganSpike Milligan quote #4