I saw a small bottle of cologne and asked if it was for sale. She said, 'It's free with purchase.' I asked her if anyone bought anything today.

I saw a sign: 'Rest Area 25 Miles'. That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired.

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot.

I bought myself a Wonderbra For fourteen ninety nine, It looked so good on the model girl's chest, And I hoped it would on mine, I took it from the packaging A…

'I got confused. I thought it was a K.Y. scare, so I bought 2000 jars of personal lubricant. I still have some.'

They look quite promising in the shop, and not entirely without hope when I get them back into my wardrobe. But then, when I put them on they tend to deteriora…