Quote #61

There's not a man in America who at one time or another hasn't had a secret desire to boot a child in the ass.

More from W. C. Fields

  1. There comes a time in the affairs of man when he has to take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
  2. Thou shalt not commit adultery ... unless in the mood.
  3. The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
  4. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar
  5. The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
  6. The coldest day I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco (also attributed to Mark Twain)
  7. The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. (from Never Give a Sucker an Even Break, in response to a man who complained of imsomn…
  8. Sometimes I wish I wasn't W.C. Fields, but that's only when I can remember who I am.

All W. C. Fields quotes