Quote #73

I stayed up all night playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and seven people died.

More from Steven Wright

  1. I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
  2. I tried to hang myself with bungee cord. I kept almost dying.
  3. I saw a small bottle of cologne and asked if it was for sale. She said, 'It's free with purchase.' I asked her if anyone bought anything to…
  4. I used to work at a factory where they made hydrants; but you couldn't park anywhere near the place.
  5. I saw a sign: 'Rest Area 25 Miles'. That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired.
  6. I want to get a full body tattoo of myself, only bigger.
  7. I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot.
  8. I was arrested for lip-syncing karaoke.

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