71 Conspiracy Quotes

I'm sure that Nero didn't set fire to Rome. It was the Christian-Bolsheviks who did that, just as the Commune set fire to Paris in 1871 and the Communists set fire to the Reichstag in 1932.

There is, then, no danger in the circumstances that anti-semitism will disappear, for it is the Jews themselves who add fuel to its flames and see that it is kept well stoked. Before the opposition to it can disappear, the malady itself must disappear. And from that point of view, you can rely on the Jews: as long as they survive, anti-semitism will never fade. (13th February 1945)

Yes, there is a conspiracy, in fact there are a great number of conspiracies that are all tripping each other up. And all of those conspiracies are run by paranoid fantasists and ham-fisted clowns. If you are on a list targeted by the CIA, you really have nothing to worry about. If however, you have a name similar to somebody on a list targeted by the CIA, then you are dead.

First of all, we have to understand what communism is. I mean, to me, real communism, the Soviet communism, is basically a mask for Bolshevism, which is a mask for Judaism.

Karpov, Kasparov, Korchnoi have absolutely destroyed chess by their immoral, unethical, prearranged games. These guys are really the lowest dogs around, and if people knew the truth about them, they would be held in more contempt than Ben Johnson, the runner, and they're going to know the truth when I do this book!

Disturbances in society are never more fearful than when those who are stirring up the trouble can use the pretext of religion to mask their true designs.

This murder of Hariri was deliberately planned and executed precisely to implicate Syria and to set in train the events which have unfolded.

I was going to do a book about the first prearranged Karpov-Kasparov match, '84-'85. But the goddamn Jews have stolen my entire file on that.

The sane understand that human beings are incapable of sustaining conspiracies on a grand scale, because some of our most defining qualities as a species are inattention to detail, a tendency to panic, and an inability to keep our mouths shut.

But today in the United States, and this shows you where fascism REALLY exists, ANY doctor in the United States who cures cancer using alternative methods will be destroyed. You cannot name me a doctor doing well with cancer using alternative therapies that is not under attack. And I KNOW these people; I've interviewed them.

We must speak the truth about terror. Let us never tolerate outrageous conspiracy theories concerning the attacks of September the 11th; malicious lies that attempt to shift the blame away from the terrorists, themselves, away from the guilty. To inflame ethnic hatred is to advance the cause of terror.

It was not my intention to doubt that, the Doctrines of the Illuminati, and principles of Jacobinism had not spread in the United States. On the contrary, no one is more truly satisfied of this fact than I am. The idea that I meant to convey, was, that I did not believe that the Lodges of Free Masons in this Country had, as Societies, endeavoured to propagate the diabolical tenets of the first, or pernicious principles of the latter (if they are susceptible of seperation). That Individuals of them may have done it, or that the founder, or instrument employed to found, the Democratic Societies in the United States, may have had these objects; and actually had a seperation of the People from their Government in view, is too evident to be questioned.

From my perspective, this is part of the continuing political campaign against my husband: I mean, look at the very people who are involved in this. They have popped up in other settings. The great story here for anybody willing to find it, write about it and explain it is this vast right-wing conspiracy that has been conspiring against my husband since the day he announced for president.

America is totally under control of the Jews, you know. I mean, look what they're doing in Yugoslavia... The Secretary of State (Madeleine Albright) and the Secretary of Defense (William S. Cohen) are dirty Jews.

The heaviest blow that ever struck humanity was the coming of Christianity. Bolshevism is Christianty's illegitimate child. Both are inventions of the Jew. The deliberate lie in the matter of religion was introduced into the world by Christianity. Bolshevism practices a lie of the same nature, when it claims to bring liberty to men, whereas in reality it seeks only to enslave them. In the ancient world the relations between men and gods were founded on instinctive respect. It was a world enlightened by the idea of tolerance. Christianity was the first creed in the world to exterminate its adversaries in the name of love. Its key note is intolerance. Without Christianity, we should not have had Islam. The Roman Empire, under Germanic influence would have developed in the direction of world domination and humanity would not have extinguished fifteen centuries of civilization at a single stroke. Let it not be said that Christianity brought man the life of the soul, for that was in the natural order of things.

Just as the Jew could once incite the mob of Jerusalem against Christ, so today he must succeed in inciting folk who have been duped into madness to attack those who, God's truth! seek to deal with this people in utter honesty and sincerity.

By the way, there are increasing signs that the Russian trials are not faked, but that there is a plot among those who look upon Stalin as a stupid reactionary who has betrayed the ideas of the revolution. Though we find it difficult to imagine this kind of internal thing, those who know Russia best are all more or less of the same opinion. I was firmly convinced to begin with that it was a case of a dictator's despotic acts, based on lies and deception, but this was a delusion.

In some causes silence is dangerous; so if any know of conspiracies against their country or king, or any that might greatly prejudice their neighbor, they ought to discover it.

Ironically, for all of [liberals'] love of conspiracy theories - the rigging of the 2000 election, vote suppression in Ohio in 2004, 9/11 being an inside job, oil companies covering up miracle technology that would allow cars to run on dirt, Britney Spears' career, etc., etc. - when presented with an actual conspiracy of Soviet spies infiltrating the U.S. government, they laughed it off like world-weary skeptics and dedicated themselves to slandering Joe McCarthy.

'It's all smokes and daggers'( commenting on the media's apparent conspiracy to discredit him)

Webb, if I put you over at Justice I want you to find the answers to two questions for me. One, who killed JFK? And two, are there UFOs?

What is going on is I am being persecuted night and day by the Jews, for telling it like it is. They want to put me in jail, they're robbing me of everything I have, they're continuously lying about me. I've had enough of this shit. The latest thing they've done is I had some stuff in storage back in Pasadena for 12 years, spent a fortune on storage fees, a fortune on safes... and these goddamn Jews in America have just gone and grabbed it all.

I'm very concerned because I think the Jews want to drive the elephants to extinction because the trunk of an elephant reminds them of an uncircumcised penis. I'm absolutely serious about that... Jews are sick, they're mental cases.

I have a crazy quirk, Eugene. I like to say what I think. And if you're gonna work for the Jews, you can no longer say what you think. You can't say the holocaust never happened, for example. That is an absolute no-no. You can't say that circumcision is a crime. There are so many things you cannot say once you get on the Jewish bandwagon. ... There used to be a lot of people like me, but little by little the Jewish spirit seems to be conquering all.

One of the reasons the God-damn Jews hate me so much, is that all my games are real. Nothing is pre-arranged, its all over the board, and if I play great, I play great. If I plunder my Queen, I'm looking to mate him too. That's real, y'know. Not like the God-damn Russian Jew players. It's all staged.

There is no United States as people think of it. It's just a puppet in the Jew's hands. It's a plaything for the Jews.

Almost everyone who has been around me turned out to be a secret agent working for the Jews, working for the CIA... The Jews have planted so many of their Jew agents and CIA rats all around me. So many people... Girlfriends, lawyers, everybody almost, turned out to be working for the CIA and the Jews! Unbelievable but true.

My basic thesis is that the Jews are a criminal people, and the Jews completely control the United States, and the Jews are using the United States as a vehicle to take over the World.

I think Bush sent that girl to Kobe's room. Bush sent that girl to Kobe's room, Bush sent that little boy to Michael Jackson's house. Bush killed Laci Peterson. Bush was fucking Paris Hilton in that video. All to get your mind off the war. Bush lied to me, they all lied to me: 'We gotta go to Iraq because they're the most dangerous country on Earth. They're the most dangerous regime in the world.' If they're so dangerous, how come it only took two weeks to take over the whole fucking country? Shit. Man, you couldn't take over Baltimore in two weeks.

'Of course it's possible that there really ISN'T any shadow government. The whole thing could be a phony story that was fed to The Washington Post to mislead our enemies. As you recall, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld recently admitted that the Pentagon had set up an office-officially named 'The Office of Disinformation'-that was supposed to put out false statements to the media, thus throwing our enemies off the track. For example, if we were getting ready to attack Iraq, officials of the Office of Disinformation would hold a press conference and state: 'Well, we're certainly not going to attack Iraq!' The news media would report this, and Iraq would relax. France, meanwhile, would surrender.

Impenetrable in their dissimulation, cruel in their vengeance, tenacious in their purposes, unscrupulous as to their methods, animated by profound and hidden hatred for the tyranny of man - it is as though there exists among them an ever-present conspiracy toward domination, a sort of alliance like that subsisting among the priests of every country.

'Do you know how hard it is to fake your own death? Only one man has pulled it off - Elvis'.

Dr. Martin, I am a man marked by death. We shall not be able to go on seeing each other for long and in your own interests I suggest you do not come here any more. Whatever happens, mark what I say: From now on Germany is in the hands of an Austrian who is a congenital liar, a former officer who is a pervert, and a clubfoot. And I tell you the last is the worst of them all. This is Satan in human form.

Remember, remember, the 5th of November The Gunpowder Treason and plot; I see of no reason why Gunpowder Treason Should ever be forgot. Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 'Twas his intent. To blow up the King and the Parliament. Three score barrels of powder below. Poor old England to overthrow.

Of all the plots and conspiracies that ever entered into the mind of man, the Gunpowder plot stands pre-eminent in horror and wickedness. The singular perseverance of the conspirators is shown by the fact, that so early as in Lent of the year 1603, Robert Catesby, who appears to have been the prime mover of the plot, in a conversation with Thomas Wintour and John Wright, first broke with them about a design for delivering England from her bondage, and to replant the Catholic religion.

The international financiers are behind all war. They are what is called the International Jew -- German Jews, French Jews, English Jews, American Jews. I believe that in all these countries except our own the Jewish financier is supreme... Here, the Jew is a threat.

I think the only way one can arrive at an understanding of his anti-Semitism growing all the time is because in America your Mr. Roosevelt had his brain trust which was made up of so many Jews, Felix Frankfurter, Claude Pepper - was it Pepper? I can't recall the other names. Oh yes, Morgenthau. It made Hitler feel more and more that an international conspiracy had caused the war, with the Jews behind it.

This evil fortune, which generally attends extraordinary men in the management of great affairs, has been imputed to divers causes, that need not be here set down, when so obvious a one occurs, if what a certain writer observes be true, that when a great genius appears in the world the dunces are all in confederacy against him.

Only the Jews had remained victorious after the dreadful days of World War I. These were the people of whom Christ said, 'Its father is the devil.'

He is responsible because of the conspiracy and the plots for all that happened to the Jewish people - from the shores of the Arctic Ocean to the Aegean Sea, from the Pyrenees to the Urals.

But the Party had declared merciless war on drinking and that's why those two remarkable party leaders had to confine themselves to the most trivial non-alcoholic drink. Had their fathers and grandfathers lived up to that moment and had they got to know it, they would have regarded it as a betrayal of Russian traditions and a trick by masons and Zionists.

In countries where associations are free, secret societies are unknown. In America there are factions, but no conspiracies.

Andrew Johnson had been suspected by many people of being concerned in the plans of Booth against the life of Lincoln or at least cognizant of them. A committee of which I was the head, felt it their duty to make a secret investigation of that matter, and we did our duty in that regard most thoroughly. Speaking for myself I think I ought to say that there was no reliable evidence at all to convince a prudent and responsible man that there was any ground for the suspicions entertained against Johnson.

Do you all have different books in the Bible than I do? Are you all Gideons? Who are the fucking Gideons? Ever met one, no! Ever seen one, no! But they're all over the fucking world, putting Bibles in hotel rooms! Every one of them: 'This Bible was placed here by a Gideon.' When? I've been here all day and I ain't seen shit! I saw the housekeeper come and go, I saw the minibar guy come and go, I've never laid eyes on a fucking Gideon! What are they, ninjas? Where are they? Where are they from? Gidea? Who the fuck are these people?! I'm gonna capture a Gideon. Yeah, I'm gonna make that my hobby. I'll call up the front desk one day and say, 'Uh, I don't seem to have a Bible in my room.'

When it rains it pours, they say. My guess is that its those damned English terrorists with their weather machine, trying to ruin our fun.

Is to accept the leadership of a crumbling country a crime? Is to prevent the Russians, the natural enemy of Germany, from obtaining our arms and manpower a crime? In Russian eyes it probably is. But I'm referring to the eyes of a westerner. I knew that we had to capitulate and I wanted it to be to the Americans and British, and not to the East. I'm not even accused of war crimes in the sense of the atrocities. It's clear they have no case against me. I came into a powerful position in 1943. How can I be accused of a conspiracy?

This war in Iraq makes millions of dollars for big corporations, either weapons manufacturers or those working in the reconstruction, such as Halliburton and its sister companies. . . It is crystal clear who benefits from igniting the fire of this war and this bloodshed: They are the merchants of war, the bloodsuckers who run the policy of the world from behind the scenes. President Bush and his ilk, the media giants, and the U.N. . . all are a fatal danger to the world, and the Zionist lobby is their most dangerous member. God willing, we will persist in fighting them. . .

One of the most effective forms of industrial or military sabotage limits itself to damage that can never be thoroughly proven - or even proven at all - to be anything deliberate. It is like an invisible political movement; perhaps it isn't there at all. If a bomb is wired to a car's ignition, then obviously there is an enemy; if public building or a political headquarters is blown up, then there is a political enemy. But if an accident, or a series of accidents, occurs, if equipment merely fails to function, if it appears faulty, especially in a slow fashion, over a period of natural time, with numerous small failures and misfirings- then the victim, whether a person or a party or a country, can never marshal itself to defend itself.

One of the impressive things about paranoid literature is the contrast between its fantasied conclusions and the almost touching concern with factuality it invariably shows. It produces heroic strivings for evidence to prove that the unbelievable is the only thing that can be believed.

The plot against Anne Boleyn was most carefully calculated. Jane Seymour deliberately tantalised the king, at the same time poisoning his mind against Anne. The rest of the queen's enemies joined in the chorus when and how they could. - Eric Ives

I have this feeling man, 'cause you know, it's just a handful of people who run everything, you know : that's true, it's provable. It's not : I'm not a fucking conspiracy nut, it's provable. A handful, a very small elite, run and own these corporations, which include the mainstream media. I have this feeling that whoever is elected president, like Clinton was, no matter what you promise on the campaign trail - blah, blah, blah - when you win, you go into this smoke-filled room with the twelve industrialist capitalist scum-fucks who got you in there. And you're in this smoky room, and this little film screen comes down : and a big guy with a cigar goes, 'Roll the film.' And it's a shot of the Kennedy assassination from an angle you've never seen before : that looks suspiciously like it's from the grassy knoll. And then the screen goes up and the lights come up, and they go to the new president, 'Any questions?' 'Er, just what my agenda is.' 'First we bomb Baghdad.' 'You got it :'

...there came a point when if a conspiracy was that powerful and subtle it became pointless to worry about it.

I thought the whole thing [Waco] was an absolute disaster and a debacle. And if any of you had been watching public access and seen the footage which was not shown on any major news media source... of the tanks, Bradley tanks shooting fire into the compound. Which I think went against the party line story, which was that they shot tear gas in order to help the mothers and the children to get out to convince 'em, while they're destroying the compound, they're getting mom and children out, you see. The soft sell is definitely the FBI's way. And anyway, so the major news said that the Branch Davidians started the fire, if I'm not mistaken. Correct me when I go off the story here.... All they did was shoot in tear gas? And yet I've seen with my own eyes, and my squeegeed third eye, footage of a Bradley tank shooting fire into the compound, which... isn't that odd that no major news source has picked up on that? You think that's newsworthy? 'Cause that basically means that the government, from the FBI, the ATF, up to Janet Reno, including Clinton, are um... liars and murderers. Hahahahaha. And, wait there's more. I mean the implications are vast. You know, if the ATF and FBI had any honour, if there was any honour left or dignity on this planet, they would commit Hari-Kari, while first admitting what they've done, and they'd kill themselves. Because they are liars and murderers. 'Oh we had to bust the compound down cos we heard child molestation was going on.' Yeah, if that's true, how come we don't see Bradley tanks knocking down Catholic churches? I'm talking if child molestation is actually your concern. 'Well there was a methamphetamine lab on the...' No there wasn't. And not one child came out of there saying they were molested. Not one child. They don't want the voice of reason spoken, folks, 'cause otherwise we'd be free. Otherwise, we wouldn't believe their fucking horseshit lies, nor the fucking propaganda machine of the mainstream media and buy their horseshit products that we don't fucking need and become a third world consumer fucking plantation which is what we're becoming. Fuck them! They are liars and murderers. All governments are liars and murderers, and I am now Jesus, and this is MY compound.